My Blog!

4/8/2025

Ended up in the Emergency Room yesterday. Woke up with my stomach hurting which only got worse as the morning went on. Went to the ER around noon when the pain reached a 9/10. Took another two hours before I got pain meds and other drugs. On the bright side nothing was clearly wrong with me after a couple tests. On the down side, this means they have no idea why this happened and while I feel alright now—albeit extremely exhausted and recovering—I don't know when/if this might happen again. Definitly one of the worst experiences of my life, and would not reccommend. Taking it slow today and trying not to over exert myself despite having a lot I need to do for school. We perservere but jesus christ that fucking sucked and this has happened at a horrible time.

My roommate has been a saint throughout all of this and things would definitly have been worse without her help. She's genuinly the only reason I stayed sane throughout the experience and she kept my spirits up in the intervals between tests.

4/2/2025

Rainy and cold today but we perservere. I'm getting my results for my ADHD evaluation later today, so I'm anxious but hopeful. It feels weird to say that I'm hopeful that I have ADHD, but if I don't then my attention problems are for a different and less fixable with drugs reason. This semester has been a struggle so far, especially with getting myself to write, so I'm hoping if I get diagnosed and can get adderall or an equivalent I'll be able to deal with finals a lot better. I think I got really burnt out at the end of last semester, particularly with writing, and I haven't really got myself back up and running from that. Writing 15 pages in 2 days will-shock and horror-fuck you up (the "Cyborgs" essay is the one I'm talking about if you're curious about reading it).

In happier news, a friend who's out of town for college is back for their spring break! it's great to see him again and I'm excited to finish the Lancer (mech TTRPG) module we were playing. We've also got a game night plan which I'm excited for. I'm also looking forward to the next Pathfinder session that my friends and I have for reasons I cannot say yet because it's spoilers and they can see my website lol (definitly no reason to be worried I promissss :3).

(Updating later today) I've gotten my diagnosis! I do indeed have ADHD, or more accurately ADD since hyperactivity isn't really something I struggle with. I've asked my doctor about medication so fingers crossed I can get that soon and make it through finals without dying and/or failing my classes.